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officialbluearmy:

latenightalaska:

I SERIOUSLY THOUGHT THIS WAS A COPPER STATUE

HELLHOUND

officialbluearmy:

latenightalaska:

I SERIOUSLY THOUGHT THIS WAS A COPPER STATUE

HELLHOUND

‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’

what if i cut off your left leg

would that make you stronger

would it

beauxbatons:

when im dead sext me through a ouija board

"your full name without an E,F,R,S,K,I,M,L,C,A,Y,N"

jackwhitevevo:

once i was babysitting my neighbor’s 6 year old and she asked me why i was so ugly and without thinking i said “i’m you from the future” and she cried for like 30 minutes

emmugh:

I like new friends because I can reuse old jokes

xxxkit:

imagine niagara falls….. but chocolate milk

what-mom:

normal people: I honestly don’t care.

me: tbh idc lol.

annoyedpenis:

i literally am my url

tympanista:

*comes to meet you at Starbucks 15 minutes late with Starbucks from another location*

i’m the popcorn kernel that never popped in the bag of life

evincibly:

am I the only one who looks at every grape before I eat it